The Chardonnay Prescription: Monthaven's Chardonnay three-liter Octavin Home Wine Bar

Hello everyone and welcome to all my new followers near and far, glad you are enjoying the blog and welcome to anyone who may be new to this blog. I hope to see you all again real soon. As you can see from the Traffic Map to the lower right hand side, folks from all over this big blue marble who enjoy stopping by for the latest wine reviews and recommendations, best of all it's free. Today's review is going to revolve around Chardonnay, yep the perennial favorite go-to wine here in the states.

Some Wine Facts: According to The Wine Institute  "If Cabernet Sauvignon is the king of red grapes, Chardonnay is the queen of whites. The variety is California's most widely planted wine~grape, with 94,986 acres reported in 2009. Chardonnay far and away remains the most popular wine in the U.S. and has continued to be the leading varietal wine for the last decade, with sales increases every year."

It has been said that a bartender is nothing short of good pharmacist but with a limited inventory. That said, I offer you the prescription for what ails you. What is that you may ask, well Chardonnay of course, it is the answer to painful economic downturns, bad relationships, bad bosses, and whatever other malady that could sour an otherwise wonderful day. So below I've outlined a tongue in cheek look at what I call the Chardonnay Prescription. Please read carefully all the warning and admonishments before taking this course of action as I can't be held responsible for any outrageous behaviors or consequences as a result of taking the Chardonnay Prescription.

This review is about two things really, one the Monthaven Chardonnay and Octavin three litre box. Now regarding the "new" three litre box which was sent to me as a sample.

Full Disclosure: Hello FTC and anyone else who may be interested, as mentioned above I received this wine as a submitted sample for the review process from Octavin.

Pros: Like Brad Pitt once said, "whats in the box?" Well to begin with the Octavin has an eight-sided foot print, it will sit in your refrigerator with ease and take up far less space then the conventional wines in the box and the fact that it comes in cardboard boxes cost less than glass bottles [which means a lower prices per sip]; boxes don’t break as easily and are lighter making it easier to ship; there's a vacuum-packed bag, which keeps the wine fresher, longer after it has been opened, all thanks to the handy-dandy spigot. Perhaps the best thing about this box is that it holds the equivalent to four standard size 750ml bottles of wine. So you have four bottles of chilled libations sitting there in your refrigerator waiting to be tapped [no corkscrew needed], the next time you have unexpected guests or even for the intentional guests who may be visiting. So there you have it, the benefits of the box alone.

Cons: Okay, so here are some of the cons and there are always a few, as with anything in life nothing is perfect. So what is the down side of the box, okay fishing the spigot out took me a little more time than I expected, I had to work with gravity as the spigot tended to not rush toward the pre-cut hole, from which it's suppose to protrude [oh-my], just not easily as I anticipated.  The spigot was good and bad, a push button design may have been better, but not sure if that was nixed because of oxidation or cost issues. The second thing it did on occasion leave a drip of wine or two, something to watch for, but for the most part it was easy to use. The last thing I noticed is that it took much longer to get cold, than a bottle does. I would recommend throwing it in the refrigerator overnight, before drinking and last thing, was the drink by date of just one year, huh c'mon unless your some kind of drunkard, you may not finish four bottles of chardonnay in a years time. So wine the proverbial bottle still has the edge over wine in the box, in this category.

Okay now it is time to review the wine: The Monhaven Winery 2008 Central Coast Chardonnay:

The Blend: A blend of cold fermented, barrel fermented and barrel aged wines and the fruit for this Chardonnay is sourced from various vineyards in Santa Barbara and Monterey, hence the Central Coast title.

About Monhaven: According to their website, "We are named for our location in Monterey County, CA, Monthaven wines benefit from one of the world’s longest growing seasons, resulting in distinctive full-bodied wines with balanced acidity, our Artisan winemaker Jeff Yamamoto crafts these Central Coast wines."

First Swirl: After opening the spigot and pouring myself a few ounces to discover a very lightly colored straw core and a watery rim.

First Sniff: Allowing the wine to warm up for a few minutes, I find on both the nose and later my palate, that this wine delivers from the vacuum packed bag, the lithe, typical tropical notes, but not much else.

First Sip: After a few sniffing around the glass and a few slurps later I found this wine to deliver a "touch all bases" Chardonnay. With just enough body and richness, creamy mouth feel, complimented by crisp apple notes and balanced acidity.

Price and Where to Purchase: You can find the Octavin Home Wine Bar in most upscale grocery stores and will find it selling anywhere from between $17 to $24. All you Chula Vista readers, I know you're there lurking about, this wine can be found at the Ralph's on East Palomar.

My Recommendation: This is a wonderful wine for hosting large parties. It pairs well with many foods and is very reasonably priced. I opened it over 3 weeks ago and it was still just as fresh as the day I poured my first glass. Hard to go wrong with an easy drinking wine, that would sell for about $5 - $6 per bottle that's not in a bottle and is so easy to get in your glass. It doesn't pretend to be anything other than it is, a reasonably priced tasty Chardonnay for everyday quaffing, when you just want a glass and not a whole bottle.

Cuvée Corner Wine Blog Score: Hey point seekers here's my score if your interested: This wine scored 87 points on the Cuvée Corner 100 point scale. If you curious about how I come up with my scores please click on that link to your right entitled the "review process". The QPR was good and ease of use scored high marks.

Other Voices: Okay, so maybe you want to hear what someone has to say about this Chardonnay, well check out this video below, where some random tasters regale you the benefits of this delightful wine.

~The Chardonnay Prescription~

~Stop hiding and start living, with Chardonnay~

Do you have feelings of inadequacy? Do you suffer from shyness? Do you sometimes wish you were more assertive? Do you have excess stress and anxiety? If you answered yes to any of these questions, ask a winemaker, tasting room attendant or local wine store owner about Chardonnay. Yes you heard me right, the benefits of drinking Chardonnay on a regular basis has been shown to have several benefits including, but not limited to:

  • Chardonnay is the safe, natural way to feel better and more confident about yourself and your actions.

  • Chardonnay can help ease you out of your shyness and let you tell the world that you're ready and willing to do just about anything.

  • Chardonnay has many benefits you'll notice almost immediately, with a regimen of regular doses you can overcome any obstacles that prevent you from living the life you want to live.

  • Chardonnay removes normal inhibitions of shyness and awkwardness and will become a thing of the past. You will most likely discover many talents you never knew you had, to everyone elses astonishment.
WARNING: Chardonnay may not be right for everyone.

Ladies: Women who are pregnant or who may become pregnant should not use Chardonnay. However, women who wouldn't mind nursing or becoming pregnant are encouraged to try it, as it can be found to relax inhibitions and produces ripe for propagation.

Side effects may include: dizziness, nausea, vomiting, incarceration, erotic lustfulness, loss of motor control, loss of clothing, loss of money, loss of virginity, delusions of grandeur, table dancing, headache, dehydration, dry mouth, and a desire to sing Karaoke and play all-night rounds of Strip Poker, Truth Or Dare, and Naked Twister just to name a few.

  • The consumption of Chardonnay may make you think you are whispering when you are not.

  • The consumption of Chardonnay may cause you to tell your friends over and over again that you love them.

  • The consumption of Chardonnay may cause you to think you can sing.

  • The consumption of Chardonnay may lead you to believe that ex-lovers are really dying for you to telephone them at four in the morning.

  • The consumption of Chardonnay may make you think you can logically converse with members of the opposite sex without spitting.

  • The consumption of Chardonnay may create the illusion that you are tougher, smarter, faster and better looking than most people.


fracas said…
What happens if you think all of those things and you haven't had any Chardonnay? Does drinking the Chardonnay then have the opposite effect?

Another side effect: The consumption of Chardonnay may lead attempting to jump into the Puget Sound and swimming to shore and, when that option finally seems unfeasible, it may lead to jumping into public fountains outside of a very very fancy restaurant.


Great post! Very humorous. The Wench *likey*.

Another side effect: The consumption of Chardonnay may lead attempting to jump into the Puget Sound and swimming to shore and, when that option finally seems unfeasible, it may lead to jumping into public fountains outside of a very very fancy restaurant.


Great post! Very humorous. The Wench *likey*.


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